Son: „Mom can I get twenty bucks” Mom: Does it look like
„Mom can I get twenty bucks?”, „Does it look like I am made of money?”, „Well isn’t that what M.O.M stands for?”
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Promises are like babies
Promises are like babies. Fun to make, but hell to deliver.
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Fighting for peace is like
Fighting for peace is like fucking for virginity.
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What a man’s like – how he treats his inferiors
If you want to know what a man’s like, take a good look at how he treats his inferiors, not his equals.
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Hospitality: making your guests feel like they’re at home
Hospitality: making your guests feel like they’re at home, even if you wish they were.
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The gym
The gym. I like this!
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My neighbours are listening to great music
My neighbours are listening to great music. Whether they like it or not.
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And live like it’s heaven on earth
You’ve gotta dance like there’s nobody watching, Love like you’ll never be hurt, Sing like there’s nobody listening, And live like it’s heaven on earth.
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Girls like photographers
Girls like photographers
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Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don’t have a good
Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don’t have a good partner, you’d better have a good hand.